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For Men Only

Toward Godly manhood in a feminized world  
Be on the alert, stand firm in the faith, act like men, be strong. I Cor. 16:13 nas




Written for a man and woman in marriage

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Knowing God as I do, I’ll bet He said to the angels, “Watch these fireworks!” when He got Adam awake after making Eve for him! Wow zee!!

Sex, and all that it implies in its pure form, is one of the most inspired and incredible aspects of all of God’s creation. It is more glorious than any sunrise, sunset or rainbow. More spectacular than any awe inspiring, snow capped mountain peak against the blue sky. More beautiful than any butterfly. More personally enriching than degrees, acclaim, being a billionaire, or any other supposed marks of human success. And it’s potential for good or evil is unsurpassed.

Phew – where do I go from there? Aaaah – okay, let’s try this.

Two Become One
God made man and woman to be very different from each other. It’s easy to figure that out when we see their bodies. Most likely it didn’t take Adam and Eve very long to realize the meaning of some of those parts and to discover the pleasure of experiencing each other while in the garden. Pure sex is a wonderful thing.

Our differences physically as male and female represent how different we are on the inside too.  Masculine and feminine emotions, and our ways of looking at and experiencing life are as different as male and female bodies are. In both cases our differences are to be conjoined to make each of us more complete. Wholeness in marriage is not represented by either masculinity or femininity, but by “and the two shall become one.” 

Sex, and God
There is something about sex, and intercourse in marriage, that has potential to represent God and our relationship with Him in a very special way. It speaks of His creative imagination; His kindness in giving us something that can be so pleasurable; unity in terms of three being one and two becoming one; and intimacy at ones’ deepest level.

In sexual intercourse a man and woman are joined to each other both physically and in spirit. They become “one flesh.” In our intimacy with God through Jesus our Savior, we become one spirit with him – again. Our spirit, the deepest part of our being, is joined with His spirit. Pure sexual intimacy then, i.e. that which is practiced between a husband and wife who love and respect each other, symbolizes the intimate relationship that God intends between mankind and Himself.

Per I Cor. 6:16-20, sexual intercourse outside of marriage is a serious thing. As God says there, “All other sins a person commits are outside the body, but whoever sins sexually, sins against their own body.” Certainly it is forgivable, but because of the nature of sexual adultery it reaches deep. I John 1:9 still applies but so does Proverbs 5.

The Dark Side of Sex
It is true of life in general that potential gain and risk go together. Something that has high potential for gain is probably also high risk. And vice-versa. That’s life. So it is with sex. Its use under Satan’s rule has brought indescribable pain and suffering in much the same way as his other main tools, money and power.

There is a “knowing” inside humans about what is right and wrong. Even babies or young children who are molested know that something very bad happened, and it affects them to the core of their being. Rape violates a person, not just a body, and when it is done by one who should be a protector instead of a predator it is life’s most painful act of betrayal.

Money, sex and power are often conjoined under Satan’s rule, as in prostitution and sex trafficking, creating a toxic witch’s brew like nothing else. It reveals his true nature and defines “evil.” It is “death” in the way that Jesus is “life.”

Feminism denies the richness of masculine and feminine. Its offspring homosexuality not only deprives persons of the reward of pure, married sex, it declares God’s creation design to be flawed. And it symbolizes the depth of intimacy which persons have chosen to enter into with Satan.

A New Mindset About Sex
Christians must not allow the way in which sex was impacted by the fall, to determine how we think about and experience it. We must view it as God originally intended, which is again possible because of our redemption. We must determine to see its true glory as one of the highest expressions of creation design. We are to reclaim the wonder of sex and its place in the marriage relationship, by having a renewed mind about it.

Because we have surrendered to Christ and have found our wholeness in Him, a couple’s “sex life” is transformed by their ability to give to each other. Lovemaking in the context of true love is altogether different than selfish sex. Actually, the difference between “having sex” and “making love” is something like the difference between limburger cheese and Elaine’s cheesecake with black raspberry topping. “Having sex” is body to body intimacy. “Making love” is person to person intimacy. “Ecstatic lovemaking” is both in the context of understanding our bodies, and loving and respecting our mate.

To love, is to give. In wholesome lovemaking, both the husband and wife will give to the other in the spirit of Phil. 2:1-4. Each will be concerned about the others’ pleasure and satisfaction. Taking that little truth seriously would revolutionize “sex” for many Christian couples.

The Challenge
Because of the devastation that sinful sex has brought to our world; and because of the power of sex to help determine a family’s well being; the restoration of sex to its proper place in life and in the marriage relationship is an important part of leading God’s people into wholeness in Christ. The fruit of that would bear testimony to “life in Christ” in a significant way.

This is #9 in the series "For Men Only" on © 2011 Ken Stoltzfus, P.O. Box 228, Kidron, OH 44636 USA. May be printed for personal use and may be reproduced for non-commercial purposes without further permission if proper acknowledgment is given. Posted 4/2/11
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